wish my name were irish

okay so i’m trying to get in contact with another super famous artist (twice nominated for the turner prize, the nobel prize of modern art, and went to the venice biennale!) and i’m having no luck.

i find out that he lives ACROSS THE STREET from the family i’m living with in derry.  WHAT?! you WILL talk to me super famous artist from derry! you WILL!

today, an art gallery dude made some lovely sweeping generalizations.  he said that he thinks northern irish contemporary art and southern irish contemporary art are quite different.  if you’re going to say something like that, i’m obviously going to ask you, “how?”  his response: “well, i think that northern art is more bleak and gray and sad.  southern art is more colorful.”  REALLY???  ARE YOU 9?!  clearly, this is the stuff that great papers are made of…